So many tears

For so long all I've done was cry over you and ask myself what is wrong with me? why does he treat me like this, when he calls me names and puts his hands on me? I've put my self down and for what? a loser who treats me like shit? i feel so stupid for the person i once was, and i still feel like I'm recovering from this bullshit... ugh i want to move on and every time i look at our child i see you and i see the pain he is gonna go through with these decissions you are making. its not only effecting you but the son you have who takes your last name... i want to take that away from you, i wish i could give him my last name you don't deserve him to carry on yours. why cant you see all the pain, you think your right for partying and going out.. do u now see when your son is beggining, he doesnt even ask cause he gave up but begging to be with you. i want whats best for my son and u being his father sadly isnt it.... your gonna wake up and realize when everything is gone and all u have is drinking and partying, but all your friends will carry on and you wont.